Christmas & Ice Fishing Trip 2010

(Special shout-out to Tucker and Keaton Hickman, who are going to love this post. Hi, guys!)

(Also, please be aware that you can click on any picture in this post to get a raging mega-huge version.)

If you’ve followed this blog at all, you’ve probably already encountered The Posts of Christmas Past (here, here, and here). Another Christmas has come and gone, so it’s time for another addition to my proud litany of holiday blog entries. This year’s trip was split into two distinct sections: Hanging Around the House and Ice Fishing. Let’s tackle them in that order, shall we?

It’s been a snowy winter, even by Minnesota standards, and the ground was thoroughly blanketed when I arrived. The giant nativity figures in the front yard were struggling to keep their heads above the snow, and we had completely lost contact with the sheep and the shortest Wise Guy. While no snow fell on the actual day I arrived, it snowed both the day before and the day after. Snow continued, off and on, throughout my stay.

This little pine tree in the front yard shows off the fresh blanket of snow rather well.

The various little tweety birds who stay in Minnesota over the winter were glad that my mom keeps her bird feeders filled, too.

OM NOM NOM

Naturally, the Hanging Around the House phase included all of the traditions you’ve read about in years past. Mom waited until I was home to trim the tree, and she and I decorated it together one of the first nights I was home. I also had the requisite trip or two to St. Stephen with my brother, his girlfriend, and her family. We gathered at the house on Christmas Eve to frost cookies and exchange presents, and both of the boys’ girlfriends were there, too. Like we do every year, we sang along to Anne Murray’s rendition of “Away In A Manger” as we placed the Christ child in the manger of the nativity scene. The only exception to the rule this year was that we showed up at midnight for midnight mass only to find that it had been held at ten o’clock. Who has midnight mass at ten o’clock? Mom was not amused. Nonetheless, we had a great time together.

Cameron (with Tanner), me, Mom, Chissom (with Tinkerbell), and Dad (with Maggie)

One of the more interesting parts of Hanging Around the House was helping Dad with a taxidermy project. He’s in the process of stuffing a series of heads for a guy who just came back from an African safari, and the animal he was working on while I was home, a Greater Kudu, was too big for him to stretch the hide by himself. My dad (and occasionally my brother) does beautiful taxidermy work, but I don’t know much about it. I’ve never really helped before, but we had a good time getting the hide over the form and sewing up the seams on this monster.

The face looks a little funky because Dad hadn't tightened it up, set the ears, sculpted the eyes, or tucked the mouth yet. Still, you can tell it's going to be impressive.

After several days of Hanging Around the House, my vacation shifted into its other phase: Ice Fishing. Dad, Chissom, Cameron, and I piled into Dad’s truck at 5 a.m., along with a SERIOUS amount of fishing equipment, and set out for Lake of the Woods, which is on the Minnesota/Canada border. It’s about a five-hour drive from the house. You’ve probably seen pictures of ice fishing adventures in past Christmas posts, but this year was a bit different. As our Christmas gift, Dad rented a sleeper house for three days, so we didn’t have to set up our own fish houses, drill our own holes, or do any of the setup work related to ice fishing. All we had to do was show up and catch fish. It was pretty fantastic. Fishing with Arnesen’s Rocky Point Resort is a first-class deal, right from the start. Upon arriving at the landing, we were greeted by a friendly employee who helped us load all our fishing stuff into this little rig:

Hey, look. Somebody found an actual USE for a Geo Tracker.

There are a few interesting features to notice about the Tracker. First, notice the snow chains on the tires. There are roads on the lake, but we had to leave the road to get to our fish house, naturally. Also, check out the giant counterweight on the front of the vehicle so that the tongue weight of the trailer doesn’t lift the front tires off the ground and make steering impossible. That big yellow blob in the back is an air bladder, “just in case something goes wrong.” We didn’t expect any problems, but the float is required by law. That thing behind the Tracker is not our fish house; it’s just a trailer used to transport us and all our stuff out onto the lake. There was plenty of room inside for us to sit comfortably and stow our gear, and the trailer was heated. There was about 14 to 16 inches of ice on the lake, which is why we had to use the Tracker. When there’s 18 inches or more, the resort switches to Bombardiers. Now THIS thing is cool:

I need one of these.

It’s just a bit bigger than a full-size van, and it’s WAY faster on the lake than the Trackers. There’s even a hydraulic door on the back that flips down to reveal stairs so people can get themselves and their gear inside. Sadly, we didn’t get to ride in the Bombardier because there wasn’t quite enough ice. As we rode out to the fish house in the trailer behind the Tracker, we had to get out at one point and walk across a short bridge. When a lake as big as Lake of the Woods freezes, it tends to break up into individual ice sheets that grind up against each other as the ice continues to form. If you’ve ever left a can of soda in your freezer, you know that liquids expand as they freeze. As the lake freezes, the ice on top of it expands, and since it can’t push very far up onto land, huge ridges form where the ice sheets meet on the lake. Like plate-tectonics, the ice sheets grind against one another and create miniature mountains of ice. The ridge we had to cross on the way to our fish house was about five feet high, and the staff at Arnesen’s had to crush or grind a flat space in the ridge and lay a bridge across it so the Trackers (and later the Bombardiers) could pass through. We had to walk across this bridge because it’s a potentially weak spot in the ice, and they don’t want to drive us across it “just in case.” Of course, there was no problem, and we hopped back in the trailer after crossing the ridge so we could enjoy the rest of the four-mile ride out to the fish house, 64 Squid.

Home sweet home

This picture was taken shortly after our arrival. From left to right, you’ll see the little blue generator (used to power cell phone chargers, radio, etc), a gas can for the generator, the fish house, assorted fishing gear and storage containers, and the big propane tank that provides fuel to the oven, stove, heater, and furnace inside. The house was ten feet wide and about twenty-two feet long. It contained bunk beds and a restroom. When we arrived, the holes were already cut, the house had been cleaned, and the heater was running. I never put on a pair of boots during the whole trip.

This is where I kicked butt for 48 hours.

Here you see my two fishing rods, which look like tiny versions of regular rods, except that these are only about two feet long. The device on the right is called a Vexilar, and it’s the wintertime version of a fish locator. Those two yellow bobbers spent the weekend disappearing again and again. Before I get into fish pictures, here are a couple more pictures of the inside of the fish house, so you can truly appreciate how firmly we were perched on the lap of luxury.

Facing the back of the house

Here’s Dad, tending his fishing area. You can see my fishing rods on the right. Behind him are the two sets of bunk beds and the restroom. Notice the smoke detector and the carbon monoxide detector. Can’t be too careful! In the foreground, you see the corner of the stove and the corner of the table.

Facing the front of the house

Here, Cameron is set up on the left, and Chissom is on the right. The card table and stove appear again, along with the minnow buckets and the very large heater. Notice the complete lack of cold-weather clothes. We could have had the place feeling like a sauna, with a heater that size. We didn’t have lines in the water very long before we started catching fish…but before I describe that, let’s have a quick review of the fish species in Lake of the Woods, shall we?

• Walleyes: Our primary target species. These are very tasty fish, and they’re prized by Minnesota fishermen. The can reach very large sizes, but the most common size on Lake of the Woods is 14 to 18 inches. Trophy walleyes exceeding 28 inches are caught fairly often.

Walleye

• Saugers: Close cousins to walleyes, saugers differ only slightly. They don’t grow as large, and they’re distinguishable by the spots on their dorsal fins and the lack of a white tip on the lower tail fin. Also, saugers tend to have bigger “shoulders” than walleyes, meaning they’re thicker in the front half of the body, and they provide thick fillets. The differences between walleyes and saugers aren’t as obvious as these pictures make them seem, and the two species can be difficult for some people to tell apart. To further complicate the matter, the two species sometimes interbreed, producing saugeyes, which have the spots on the dorsal fin as well as the white tip on the tail fin.

Sauger

• Yellow Perch: For some bizarre reason, Southerners call bluegills and sunfish “perch,” even though they’re not. A perch is an entirely separate species. These fish are fairly small in most lakes, ranging from six to eight inches, but Lake of the Woods, with its excellent nutritional resources, produces some as big as fourteen inches. Genetically related to walleyes, perch are good eating fish.

Perch

• Eelpout (also called Burbot or Ling Cod): Many anglers really, really hate these fish. They’re big, they’re hungry, and they’re ugly. Eelpout get quite big; in fact, I don’t think I’ve ever seen a particularly small one. As a cod species, they’re pretty tasty, but many people refuse to eat them based on the ugly factor. Nobody wants to catch eelpout, but a big one is sure fun to have on the line.

Eelpout

• Tulibee: Whitefish, tilapia, ciscoe, tulibee, it’s all pretty much the same fish. We don’t keep tulibee to eat, just because walleyes are so much better, but many people do like them. I’ve never known tulibees to get particularly big.

Tulibee

The lake is also home to muskellunge, northern pike, lake trout, and sturgeon, but we didn’t catch any of those, so there’s really not much point in posting pictures. Now, have you got all the above species committed to memory? There will be a quiz later.

As I was saying before the fish descriptions, we didn’t have our lines in the water for more than a few minutes when this happened:

Cameron helps Chissom land a fish

It can be a little challenging to reach down to the surface of the ice while holding a fishing rod in one hand and trying to handle a squirming fish, so the guy nearest someone who’s reeling up a fish usually gives him a hand. Once the action started, it was hand-over-fist for sometimes an hour at a time. Honestly, the fishing was tremendous. Let’s take a look at one of each species…

Dad with a pretty good walleye--see the lack of spots on the dorsal fin and the white tip on the tail? Also, notice the eye from which the species draws its name.

 

Here's Chissom with a fat little perch

Cameron caught the only tulibee of the trip.

This is a pot-bellied eelpout that we estimated at 9 or 10 pounds. Dad was not thrilled to be my fish-grabber on this one.

Of course, taking good fish pictures is all a matter of perspective...

After looking through all the fish pictures, I discover that I don’t have a picture of a sauger. Just imagine a small walleye with different spots, okay? Of course, we did more than catch fish in 64 Squid. We also…

...ate steaks...

...cleaned fish...

...relaxed...

 

...and wandered around the lake in boxer shorts and loafers.

By the end of the weekend, we’d caught over 120 walleyes/saugers, along with a few fish of the non-target species. We ate fish on the lake one night, and we had fresh fish again the night after we got home. All in all, it was a fantastic trip. I hope to go back within a year or two. I was sad to leave ol’ 64 Squid.

Winter, contrary to Southern belief, is beautiful.

THIS could be a struggle…

This is the Houston Texans’ regular season schedule for next year:

• Sunday, September 12 vs. Indianapolis Colts (CBS), noon
• Sunday, September 19 @ Washington Redskins (CBS), 3:15pm
• Sunday, September 26 vs. Dallas Cowboys (FOX), noon
• Sunday, October 3 @ Oakland Raiders (CBS), 3:05pm
• Sunday, October 10 vs. New York Giants (FOX), noon
• Sunday, October 17 vs. Kansas City Chiefs (CBS), noon
• Sunday, October 24 BYE WEEK
• Monday, November 1 @ Indianapolis Colts (ESPN), 7:30pm
• Sunday, November 7 vs. San Diego Chargers (CBS), noon
• Sunday, November 14 @ Jacksonville Jaguars (CBS), noon
• Sunday, November 21 @ New York Jets (CBS), noon
• Sunday, November 28 vs. Tennessee Titans (CBS), noon
• Thursday, December 2 @ Philadelphia Eagles (NFL), 7:20pm
• Monday, December 13 vs. Baltimore Ravens (ESPN), 7:30pm
• Sunday, December 19 @ Tennessee Titans (CBS), noon
• Sunday December 26 @ Denver Broncos (CBS), 3:05pm
• Sunday, January 2, 2011 vs. Jacksonville Jaguars (CBS), noon

Games against teams that made the playoffs last year:  7

Games against teams that went 8-8 or better last year: 11

That’s a tall order. In fact, almost every analyst I’ve read declares this the most difficult schedule in the NFL. For fans, though, it’s going to be a fun season to watch. The Texans have two Monday night games, and they’re hosting NFL juggernauts like Peyton Manning, Miles Austin, Philip Rivers, Chris Johnson, Ray Lewis, and Antonio Gates in Houston.

I don’t know whether the Texans can improve on last year’s 9-7 record against a schedule like this, but I have high hopes. Of couse, if they’re going to make the playoffs, it’ll almost certainly have to be via the WildCard. That’s just the way of the world when you play in the same division as the Colts…

In case you’re wondering whether ice fishing kicks ass…

…it does.

These are two different fish, both caught by my dad last weekend.

31 inches, 11.5 pounds...not a bad walleye, huh? Cameron seems to approve.

Oh, sure, one huge walleye is nice, but two is better, right?

The wildly disparate picture sizes are due to the wildly disparate capabilities of Cameron’s phone and Mom’s…

So…The Vikings Lost

So. That’s it, friends. The Vikings fell to the mighty Saints in overtime last night. Contrary to many people’s expectations, I am not crushed. In fact, I’m entirely satisfied with the way the Vikings’ night (and season) ended.

I can hear my fellow Purple People screaming as they read this: “What are you SAYING? Favre was gonna take us ALL THE WAY!”

I agree that Favre could have lead the Vikings to the Super Bowl, but the truth of the matter is that he didn’t. Neither he nor the rest of the offense played well enough last night to earn a win. No team that gives up three lost fumbles (and two more luckily recovered by the Vikings) and two interceptions can reasonably expect to beat an opponent of any skill. The only reason the game was even close enough to go into overtime is that the Vikings’ defense is absolutely beastly (which should be news to nobody).

On the whole, the Vikings’ loss to the Saints is a microcosm for their whole season. They performed better than anyone thought they could. They were competitive right down to the end. Their defense was amazing. Adrian Peterson fumbled too much. Brett Favre was a brilliant quarterback with a tendency to make risky throws in pressure situations. As painful as the truth may be, it’s still the truth: the game (and season) ended as they should have.

Vikings fans will whine about the questionable Robert Meachem catch on the final drive, the questionable airborne Pierre Thomas first-down run, the officials, the crowd, and various other imagined scapegoats. While I agree that the catch was actually a trap against the ground and the airborne run involved a loss of possession, neither of those plays lost the Vikings the game. The Vikings lost the game when AP and Bernard Berrian committed multiple fumbles (along with one by Percy Harvin) and Brett Favre threw two interceptions, most notably the back-breaker with a few seconds to go in regulation.

This sort of thing is a real problem.

So. The Vikings, as I said earlier, just didn’t play well enough to win. The Saints did. As such, I’m okay with the results. I’m also happy for the Saints, who are a great team and are headed to their first-ever Super Bowl.

In the wake of this loss, a few questions immediately spring to mind. Most notably, I wonder whether Favre will be back. If I had to guess, I’d say no. I know they signed him to a two-year deal. I know he had one of the best years of his career. On the other hand, did you SEE him last night? He got his ass handed to him again and again by the Saints’ defense, and he got up off the turf S-L-O-W-L-Y several times. His wife looked completely distraught, and let’s face it: wives have some influence over their husbands’ decisions. He had a hell of a run and proved that he’s still the man. I can’t believe he’ll come back and put his body through all this again just for the chance to hold the Lombardi trophy over his head one more time.

Then again, he IS Brett Favre.

If he’s NOT coming back, I hope he’ll tell the team soon. Like tomorrow. They will need to start shopping for a quarterback immediately. Let’s be frank: Sage Rosenfels is a fine bench QB, but he’s not an NFL starter, and Tarvaris Jackson is TERRIBLE. Watching him play football literally sucks my will to live. He will never, ever be a successful NFL quarterback.

So. Thanks for a hell of a year, Brett Favre. Thanks for a hell of a year, Adrian Peterson. Thanks for a hell of a year, Vikings defense. Welcome to stardom, Sidney Rice; you’re a beast. Welcome to only slightly less stardom, Percy Harvin; you, too, are a beast. Welcome to the ranks of fantastic NFL tight ends, Visanthe Shiancoe; I drafted you in the twelfth round and never regretted it. If any of you aren’t coming back (I’m talking to YOU, Brett), please let us know ASAP. We’ve got to start preparing for next year’s repeat win of the NFC North.

For another opinion on why this loss isn’t the end of the world, check out this guy’s blog.

Fantasy Football Draft: TRC League

On Saturday night, I hosted the 2009 draft party for the TRC Fantasy Football League. I spent the day constructing an easel, organizing beers and snacks, cleaning the house a little, and getting high on Sharpie fumes while creating the draft boards. At the appointed hour, my fellow owners arrived. Nine of the ten team owners were in attendance, and the tenth drafted via telephone. I wasn’t thrilled to draw 8th draft position in a 10-man league, but I think my team is pretty solid. Before I discuss my individual picks, check out my final roster:

• QB: Matt Schaub
• RB1: DeAngelo Williams
• RB2: Pierre Thomas
• WR1: Calvin Johnson
• WR2: Dwayne Bowe
• WR3: Chad Ochocinco
• TE: Visanthe Shiancoe
• K: Nate Kaeding
• DEF: Eagles
• Bench RB: Beanie Wells
• Bench RB: Cedric Benson
• Bench WR: Donnie Avery
• Bench WR: Miles Austin
• Bench QB: Donovan McNabb
• Bench TE: Jeremy Shockey

Now, for the round-by-round explanation.

Round 1

1. Adrian Peterson
2. Steve Slaton (I almost fainted. No lie.)
3. Matt Forte
4. Michael Turner
5. Maurice Jones-Drew
6. Steven Jackson
7. Ladainian Tomlinson
8. DeAngelo Williams
9. Larry Fitzgerald
10. Drew Brees

As my turn to choose in the first round grew nearer, I could see that the majority of the top-tier RBs had already been selected. I was tempted to jump ship and grab Larry Fitzgerald, who’s clearly the best WR in the NFL right now. I knew that if I didn’t draft him, either the 9 or 10 man would. However, even though WRs have been a hot commodity for the last couple years, I still believe that solid RBs are the best bet. Many people have their doubts about DeAngelo Williams, but he finished last year as the highest scorer in all of fantasy football, and Jonathan Stewart is still sidelined by injury. Williams carried me to the playoffs last year, and I trust him to do so again. I also knew that my next pick was only five names away, and I hoped to be able to land a top-tier WR in round 2.

Round 2

1. Chris Johnson
2. Tom Brady
3. Calvin Johnson
4. Andre Johnson
5. Randy Moss
6. Brian Westbrook
7. Peyton Manning
8. Frank Gore
9. Marion Barber
10. Greg Jennings

After watching Larry Fitzgerald fly off the board in the first round, I was surprised that the 10 man didn’t grab a WR. He wanted Brees for his QB pretty badly, I guess. Lucky for me, that left Calvin “Megatron” Johnson on the board. I didn’t think twice. Megatron had a fantastic year on a TERRIBLE Lions team last season, and I’m convinced the team will be significantly better this season, which can only mean that Johnson’s numbers will improve. After this pick, I had to wait a long time to take another player…

Round 3

1. Aaron Rodgers
2. Reggie Wayne
3. Anquan Boldin
4. Steve Smith (Carolina)
5. Roddy White
6. Brandon Jacobs (How was he still available???)
7. Marques Colston
8. Dwayne Bowe
9. Clinton Portis
10. Kevin Smith

Last year, I suffered because I had a remarkably unreliable receiving corps. With my next pick just four slots away, I decided to take a chance on my RB2 and take a second WR in the third round. At this point, all the tier-1 WRs were gone, but Dwayne Bowe is at the very top of tier 2. Basically, he’s the only valid receiving option the Chiefs have. Amani Toomer is older than God, and nobody else on the depth chart has ever made serious waves in the NFL. Also, the Chiefs traded away Tony Gonzalez to the Falcons, which increases the number of looks Bowe is likely to get.

Round 4

1. Vincent Jackson
2. Marshawn Lynch
3. Pierre Thomas
4. Ryan Grant
5. Wes Welker
6. Terrel Owens
7. Ronnie Brown
8. Kurt Warner
9. Braylon Edwards
10. Anthony Gonzalez

I knew I needed a second stud RB here, and I was torn between Pierre Thomas and Ryan Grant. They both play for great teams, but both of those teams rely primarily on the passing game for their offenses. In the end, I chose Thomas because the Saints’ offense is so incredibly ridiculous. Often, they enter the 4th quarter with significant leads, and I expect Thomas to earn significant yards while the Saints run out the clock. Although the team still has Reggie Bush on the roster, I think it’s becoming clear that he’s more of a specialty back than an every-down ball carrier. I expect Thomas to be the workhorse in New Orleans this season.

Round 5

1. Jason Witten
2. T.J. Houshmandzadeh
3. Antonio Gates
4. Tony Gonzalez
5. Philip Rivers
6. Matt Ryan
7. Dallas Clark
8. Chad Ochocinco
9. Owen Daniels
10. Santana Moss

Clearly, the cool thing to do in Round 5 was draft a TE. Unfortunately, the 8 man doesn’t get to draft with the cool kids. Witten, Gates, Gonzo, and Clark were all selected before I even started thinking about a TE. I’ve had Gates for the past two years, and I know that a good TE can provide much-needed separation between my score and my opponent’s. On the other hand, I also know that after the top 5 guys or so, TEs are all the same. Since all the top-tier TEs had just been drafted (and because I had a TE sleeper in my back pocket), I decided to fill out my main skill position starters by selecting WR Chad Ochocinco. Yeah, yeah. I know he was disappointing last year. I know he’s going to try to Tweet during games. I know he’s basically kind of an ass-hat. On the other hand, he’s freakishly talented, and now that T.J. Housh has been traded, Ocho will be the center of the Bengals’ receiving corps. I’m looking for him to revert to the kinds of numbers he posted in the five years before last season’s miserable campaign (10, 9, 9, 7, and 8 TDs, respectively). After five rounds, I had my two starting RBs and my three starting WRs, and I was pretty damned proud of myself.

Round 6

1. Chris Cooley
2. Roy Williams
3. Matt Schaub
4. Tony Romo
5. Greg Olsen
6. Brandon Marshall
7. Antonio Bryant
8. Bernard Berrian
9. Derrick Ward
10. DeSean Jackson

Like TEs, there were two options when drafting QBs this year. I could either reach WAY too early for one of the big names, or I could wait and get one of the many guys who are just a hair less productive. Before the draft began, I made the conscious decision to wait. My decision was rewarded handsomely. Matt Schaub is in a position to have a fantastic year. He’s got some of the best WRs in the league in Andre Johnson and Kevin Walter, a great RB in Steve Slaton, and Owen Daniels, who’s no slouch at TE. If he can stay healthy, I think he’ll put up top-5 QB numbers this year.

Round 7

1. Larry Johnson (My prediction for this year: three arrests, one conviction)
2. Knowshon Moreno
3. Willie Parker
4. Lee Evans
5. Kellen Winslow
6. Kevin Walter
7. Eddie Royal
8. Donnie Avery
9. Donald Driver
10. Santonio Holmes

Pop Quiz: Tell me everything you know about Laurent Robinson, Keenan Burton, Tim Carter, Derek Stanley, and Brooks Foster. I’ll wait. Can’t come up with anything? I didn’t think so. Here’s the answer: They’re all the St. Louis Rams receivers not named Donnie Avery. The fact that neither you nor I can recall anything about any of the aforementioned guys makes me think Avery is a pretty solid choice for a back-up WR. The fact that he caught 53 passes for 674 yards and 3 TDs last year as a rookie doesn’t hurt, either.

Round 8

1. Darren McFadden (GREAT pick in round 8…)
2. Steelers DEF
3. Chris Wells
4. Ray Rice
5. LenDale White
6. Joe Addai (another solid round-8 choice)
7. Jonathan Stewart (…and another)
8. Reggie Bush
9. Hines Ward
10. Thomas Jones (…and still another)

Apparently, Round 8 is the time to get your hands on a fantastic back-up RB. Because the NFL has a glut of talent at RB right now, and because the majority of teams are involved in some kind of running-back-by-committee situation, some fantastic players are going to be sitting on fantasy benches, waiting for their turn to shine. My choice among those hopefuls is Chris “Beanie” Wells, and here’s why: for starters, this guy was BEAST in college. (Check the link. If I’m lyin’, I’m dyin’.) If his college skills translate to the NFL at all, he could be very impressive. Secondly, the Cardinals are an outstanding offensive team. Their passing attack is second-to-none. The team’s coaches have said that they’d like to open up even more opportunities for Warner, Fitz, and Boldin to shred opposing secondaries by focusing a bit more on the running game this season. That sounds like more carries, to me. Finally, the Cards’ current starter, Tim Hightower, just isn’t all that good. With a smooth 2.8 yards per carry last year, compared to Wells’ 5+ in college, I think Wells will be getting a good share of the carries in Arizona within a few weeks.

Round 9

1. Jerricho Cotchery
2. Lance Moore
3. Derrick Mason
4. Torry Holt (Isn’t he in an old-folks’ home yet?)
5. Steve Breaston
6. Ted Ginn, Jr.
7. Jay Cutler
8. Donovan McNabb
9. Devin Hester
10. Josh Morgan

Wow. Did this really happen? Did I get last year’s 7th-best QB for total yards and 8th-best QB for touchdowns in the NINTH round? I think I did. Here’s another question: Is this guy surrounded by a ton of talent this year, in the form of DeSean Jackson, Kevin Curtis, Hank Baskett, and Brian Westbrook? I think he is. All in all, I’d say Donovan McNabb is ready to have a solid year. I’d venture to say that he’s somebody’s starting QB in lots of 12-team leagues. Say what you will about the addition of Michael Vick to the Eagles’ roster. I think it’ll add an element to McNabb’s game that he’s never had before. I also think it’ll give him a few downs every game to come over to the sidelines and take a quick break. After all, he’s not getting any younger. Nevertheless, I’m thrilled to draft him this late as my back-up QB.

Round 10

1. Giants DEF
2. Willis McGahee
3. Eagles DEF
4. Laveranues Coles
5. Ravens DEF
6. Carson Palmer
7. Robert Meachem (too soon!)
8. Ben Roethlisberger
9. Matt Cassel
10. Percy Harvin (damn…I wanted him)

This was not a good pick. I was feeling pretty good about all my starters, and I just wasn’t sure where to turn next. The only thing I didn’t already have was a starting TE, and as I’ve already said, I had a sleeper TE pick waiting in the wings. So…I kinda choked. Looking at the people who were drafted after Round 10, I’m not sure there’s anyone there I’d REALLY rather have than the Eagles’ DEF, but I know I could have gotten them a round or two later. Oh, well.

Round 11

1. Matt Hasselbeck
2. Dominik Hixon
3. Steve Smith (New York)
4. Titans DEF
5. Vikings DEF
6. Darren Sproles
7. Cowboys DEF
8. Cedric Benson
9. Trent Edwards
10. David Garrard

Cedric Benson is one of the few true feature backs left in the NFL. He will get the VAST majority of the carries out of the Bengals’ backfield. While it’s true that he has never had a great season as a pro (or even a good season, some would argue), he was a machine in college. That kind of talent doesn’t just evaporate. (I hope…) Even if I only put Benson into my lineup to cover bye weeks or–perish the thought–injuries, he’s an every-down back. It might be very ugly, but he’ll get yards. That’s all I have to say about that. Stop laughing.

Round 12

1. John Carlson
2. Bobby Engram
3. Visanthe Shiancoe
4. Nate Burleson
5. Chris Chambers
6. Justin Gage (nice pick-up, here)
7. Steven Gostkowski (…a kicker in the 12th? Wow. Just wow.)
8. Rob Bironas (…ANOTHER kicker? I’ll be taking this guy’s money at the end of the season.)
9. Nate Washington
10. Chris Henry (This could be the pick of the draft. No lie.)

At last, my much-discussed TE sleeper pick is revealed. In addition to the fact that his name is awesome and he looks just like a guy I knew in college, Visanthe Shiancoe caught 42 passes for 596 yards and 7 TDs last season…and that was with a combination of Gus “I Went To School With Cain and Abel” Frerotte and Tarvaris “I Suck At Football” Jackson at QB. This year, the Vikings have signed Brett Favre. While I think it’s a terrible idea for the team as a whole, I happen to know that Favre LOVES to throw to his TEs. Considering that TE is a position where four or five guys make up the top tier and everyone else is miles behind, I’m thrilled to have picked up Shiancoe, who could very possibly have a great season, at this late stage of the draft.

Round 13

1. Felix Jones
2. Heath Miller
3. Isaac Bruce (Holy crap. I think he’s older than Torry Holt!)
4. Eli Manning
5. Lawrence Maroney
6. Kyle Orton (fantastic choice this late in the draft)
7. Brent Celek
8. Miles Austin
9. Ahmad Bradshaw
10. Kevin Curtis

Oftentimes, these late-round picks involve following my gut more than anything else. I watched Miles Austin play a bit in some preseason exhibitions, and he’s got game. Right now, he’s listed as the Cowboys’ third WR behind Roy Williams and Patrick Crayton. If I had to bet on it, though, I’d say that Austin will overtake Crayton as the team’s WR2 by mid-season. He’s just GOOD, and Crayton, frankly, leaves something to be desired. Will Austin ever enter my starting lineup? Maybe not. Am I glad to have him sitting on my bench, waiting for his chance to step up? Certainly.

Round 14

1. Jamal Lewis (great pick…see my explanation of Cedric Benson)
2. Ryan Longwell
3. Jeremy Shockey
4. Garrett Hartley (he’s suspended for a substance abuse offense…oops)
5. Jason Elam
6. Neil Rackers
7. Earnest Graham
8. Chargers DEF
9. Kris Brown
10. Mason Crosby

Round 14 became “The Round Of The Kicker,” for some odd reason. After reaching too far ahead to get my DEF, I decided to wait on my K and offer another grizzled veteran a chance at resurrecting himself. Jeremy Shockey has had moments of brilliance in his career. Of course, he’s also had moments that everyone would like to forget. As my back-up TE, I don’t need much from him. As a member of the Saints, though, he’s part of a freakishly productive offensive squad, and it wouldn’t surprise me if he made my starting roster now and again.

Round 15

1. Bears DEF
2. Patriots DEF
3. Earl Bennett
4. Fred Taylor
5. Julius Jones (potential upside: enormous)
6. LeSean McCoy
7. Donald Brown
8. Nate Kaeding
9. Tim Hightower
10. Robbie Gould

The Chargers score lots of points. Thus, one can reasonably conclude that they have the ball down near the goalpost fairly often. Lucky for me, Nate Kaeding is pretty good at kicking said ball through said goalpost. Voila.

Well, that’s my team. I don’t think I’m going to run away with the league or anything, but I’m happy with my results, considering my 8th position in the draft. I don’t see any major weaknesses in my team, and I’ve got a solid bench at each skill position (TE being the possible exception). Anyone who has played fantasy with me in the past knows that I make my living scouring the waiver wire for each week’s opportunistic add, so the draft isn’t the end-all-and-be-all of my fantasy season. It’s nice to have a solid base, though.

Use the “Comment” link to tell me what you think. Next week, I’ll draft my second league.

Baseball Is Here!

On Monday night, I excitedly rushed to the local Buffalo Wild Wings to get a good table in the bar. I made sure I could see the big-screen TVs, ordered a beer, and settled in for the most important game of the Spring. The only thing that put a damper on my evening was all the damn basketball fans who gathered to watch the final game of that interminable tournament. I braved hordes of them so I could get a good seat for the Astros’ season opener.

I get nostalgic just from looking at images like this…

That’s right, people. I’m excited, really excited, that baseball season has arrived. You see, my love affair with baseball stretches back literally as far as I can remember. One of my earliest memories is of watching my father play in a city-league fastpitch game when I was barely old enough to walk. I can’t remember a day when I didn’t own a baseball mitt. The neighborhood where I grew up had about 15 boys who were close enough in age to get a game of baseball going literally every day of every summer from about 1987 until 1992. I watched my home team win the World Series in 1987 and 1991. I can still name every position player from both of those fantastic Twins teams. Baseball was a central point of my childhood. It’s a game of my past.

When the players’ union decided to quibble with the management a few years back, and we all had to endure strikes and other shenanigans from the players, I bailed out on baseball. I stayed gone for a long time, too. I’m just not into celebrity millionaires who whine because they don’t get paid enough. A few years ago, though, my buddy WrongFoot (who you may recall from his St. Patrick’s Day hijinks) got me started again. All summer long, any day they had a game, he had the Astros on one of his TVs. That’s right. There were two TVs in WrongFoot’s living room, one for sports and another for more sports. This is a tradition that both WrongFoot and I have chosen to continue to this very day. It’s a game of obsession.

Once WF got me started again, I fell back into my old ways. I have rediscovered my love for America’s pastime. Nothing in the world could be more indicative of summertime than baseball on the TV or radio, a cold bottle of beer in one hand, and a spatula in the other as I stand in front of a smoky Weber grill. Baseball IS summer, and that’s all there is to it. It’s a game of sunny days and charcoal.

I have acquaintances (because who could be friends with such people?) who say things like, “How can you watch baseball? It’s so BORING.” These misguided souls just don’t understand. Baseball is the easiest sport in the world to watch on TV. If you want to sit and really concentrate on the game, there are countless nuances to observe: the defensive shift against a left-handed hitter, the way a pitcher changes his pitch selection the second time through the line-up, the cat-and-mouse games a baserunner plays with the catcher, and the hitter keeping his hands back so he can slap the ball into the opposite field instead of grounding out to his strong side. It’s a game of a million details.

If you’re not in the mood to study the game, though, you can also watch baseball far more casually. I can stand at the grill and just listen to the commentators tell me about the game while I have another conversation or concentrate on my steaks. If anything truly astonishing happens–a towering home run, an acrobatic double play, or a diving catch in center field–they’ll give me a nice slow-motion replay. It’s a game of grand moments.

The Astros lost to the Cubs with flying colors, and I don’t even care. I’m just glad to see baseball on TV. Another of the beautiful parts of baseball is that the season is 162 games long. One loss doesn’t really mean anything. Hot streaks and slumps come and go. Baseball fans know–just know–that their boys will step it up tomorrow, next week, next month, and get back on the winning side of the ledger. It’s game of hope.

Sure, football is more exciting and fast-paced than baseball. One could argue that basketball, with its last-second buzzer beaters, is more intense. Certainly, ice hockey is a greater gladatorial spectacle. Baseball, though, is epic. What moment in sports is greater than watching the pitcher mop the sweat from his brow and look to the catcher for the sign that will decide the pitch he’s going to throw the opposing clean-up hitter, who’s threatening to drive in the tying run in the bottom of the ninth? What else could make thousands of people hold their breath, cross their fingers, and silently mouth the words, “Come on come on come on”? Even if you’re not usually a baseball fan, tune in to a game during this opening week and see what we fans see all summer long: It’s a game of grandeur.

Football Hall Of Fame Announces 2009 Inductees

On Saturday, January 31, the Pro Football Hall of Fame announced its 2009 inductees. The list includes four defensive players, one offensive player, and a long-time owner. Here’s a glance at the career highlights for this year’s honorees.

Bob Hayes

"Bullet" Bob Hayes: two-sport phenom

Wide receiver Bob Hayes, known as “Bullet” Bob Hayes, was the first athlete to successfully cross over from the world of track and field to the world of the NFL. After winning gold medals in the 1964 Olympics for the 100-meter dash and the 4×100 relay, Hayes entered the NFL draft and was selected in the seventh round by the Dallas Cowboys. As a wide receiver, Hayes led the NFL in receiving touchdowns in each of his first two seasons, and he was an instrumental part Dallas’ first-ever Super Bowl victory in 1971, making him the only athlete ever to win an Olympic gold medal and a Super Bowl championship ring.

Randall McDaniel

Randall McDaniel: do NOT mess with this man

Randall McDaniel played offensive guard for the Minnesota Vikings from 1988 until 1999, then spent the final two years of his career with the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. While offensive linemen don’t often garner much attention from the media or casual fans, McDaniel played so impressively that he was selected to 12 consecutive Pro Bowls, an NFL record. He also started 202 consecutive games, a feat almost unheard of at the brutally physical position of offensive guard.

Bruce Smith

Bruce Smith: Owning you, before and after

Probably the most high-profile inductee, defensive end Bruce Smith, was one of the most electrifying defensive players in recent memory. The first overall pick of the 1985 draft, Smith immediately began building his reputation as a quarterback sacking machine. By 1989, he broke the Bills’ all-time sack record when he recorded number 59. Smith was just getting started, though. By the time he retired in 2003, Smith had recorded an all-time best 200 career sacks, surpassing Reggie White’s mark. Although he never won a Super Bowl championship ring, Smith was a vital part of the defense that fought its way to four straight Super Bowl appearances from 1991-1994.

Derrick Thomas

Derrick Thomas: Steve Young's chiropractor

Another defensive standout, Derrick Thomas, spent his entire eleven-year career with the Kansas City Chiefs after the team selected him with the fourth overall pick of the 1989 draft. Selected to the Pro Bowl in his rookie season, Thomas would earn eight more selections in the following ten years. Thomas holds Chiefs career records for sacks, safeties, fumble recoveries, and forced fumbles. He also holds the all-time NFL records with 45 forced fumbles in his career and a single game in which he recorded 7 sacks.

Ralph Wilson

Ralph Wilson: Elder statesman of professional football

Ralph Wilson is the owner of the Buffalo Bills, one of the founders of the AFL, and one of the most senior owners of an NFL franchise. He has been the owner and president of the Buffalo Bills since the team’s inception in 1959. Wilson’s financial support and outspoken policy-making helped the AFL stay afloat as a challenger to the long-established NFL, and he was one of the pioneers of the merger of the two leagues in 1970.

Rod Woodson

Rod Woodson: Doing what he does best, running back an interception

Rod Woodson’s NFL career spanned fifteen years, four teams, two all-time NFL records: 1483 interception return yards and 12 interceptions returned for touchdowns. Woodson was selected for eleven Pro Bowl appearances, was named 1993 defensive player of the year, and won a Super Bowl championship with the Ravens following the 2000 season.